Poster Revealed

Phoenix To Soundtrack Mind Terrorists?

Actor turned Actor-Musician turned Musician, Joaquin Phoenix, the retired actor who is currently pursuing a career in the music industry, has hinted that he may be contributing to the soundtrack of Mind Terrorists. In an interview with the Village Voice he said:

"Uh, ah, well, uh, maybe, uh, you know, um, well, its like, uh you know, songs on... [indecipherable speech]... uh, maybe, yeah."

The soundtrack of the film has been much discussed on internet fan forums, after a studio leak named a number of the songs that will be used in the finished cut. U2 have confirmed that they have recorded the theme song for the film called "Gimme My Brain Back" a raucous track which contains the following lyrics

Nightime in the big city/ A tramps blood on the tv/ Lets kiss the streets where vipers prey/ I wanna put my brain away/ away away away away.

Bonjour, Oiche Mhaith / Don't ya know baby you've been caught/ All your dreams are outta whack/ Come on Baby, gimme my brain back / back back back baaaacccckkkkk!!!

Yeah Yeah Oh/ Tell me what ya didnt know/ I hate to say I told you so
Just Gimme back my brain

Yeah Yeah Oh/ Tell me what ya didnt know/ I hate to say I told you so
Just Gimme back my brain

Lee Hits Out At "Racist" Mind Terrorists.

Acclaimed director Spike Lee has launched a stinging attack on the upcoming 'Mind Terrorists', describing the script as the "most racist and offensive" screenplay he has ever encountered. Lee, known for his innovative "joints", was given a copy of the script by an acquaintance and baulked at "the endless slew of intensely racist dialogue and casual racial profanity". A copy of the script obtained by the blog reveals a number of questionable scenes and some truly bizarre dialogue.

Spoiler Alert!!

In one scene Jefferson Franklin offers a black man in a suit some fried chicken in exchange for information to which the black man responds Aw, thank you, massa, you a kind, kind man, and eats the food off the ground like a dog, growling at anyone who approaches.

Franklin refers to the constant danger of slit eyed devious Japs, who eat dog blood and kill their young.

Franklin reserves particular scorn for Jews, in one scene tying a Rabbi's hand's behind his back before he agrees to a conversation. Afterwards, he executes the man in front of his children, smears the resultant blood on a crucifix and says that's my good deed for the day.

Exuberant Black Man Sought For Sidekick Role

The producers of 'Mind Terrorists' have launched an open casting call looking for fresh black talent. The role of sidekick Milton 'Jive' Noirhomme is now open to all who fit the following criteria:

Black
Man
"Street"
Attitudinal
Babyfaced
Humourously succinct
Laconically concise
Expressively bewildered
Inherently proletarian
Ability to reduce outrageous events to brief, zippy, trailer friendly one-liners

All video applications to be sent to Mcktrn Productions, Sunset Boulevard, Gneevguilla.

Brando Contract Jeopardises Mind Terrorists

Variety has reported that production of the upcoming 'Mind Terrorists' has been thrown into doubt following recent revelations regarding the agreed contract of the late Marlon Brando. According to sources, Brando auditioned for the role of Jefferson Franklin M.D. in late 2003, only months prior to his death. After a successful screen-test, Brando was offered the role and a contract was signed in November 03. The contract, which producers believed was subject to Brando's manifest existence on planet earth, is, in fact, an 'endless decree', which stipulates that:

"as long as the name and life history of Marlon Brando is understood contextually by residents of the Milky Way and/or existing or discovered surrounding realms, the 'Mind Terrorists' contract agreed by Mr Brando in November 2003 AD is withstanding."

According to legal experts, this means that irregardless of who stars in the film 'Mind Terrorists' or "any film which bears a similar plot or title", the contract agreed by Mr Brando must be honoured and his descendants are entitled to compensation should the film be made.

Unfortunately for the film's producers, the contract is mired in celebrated Brandonian hubris and contains the following stipulations:

Mr Brando will be paid an initial fee of 87 million dollars for his portrayal of Jefferson Franklin M.D.

Mr Brando is entitled to 200% of the film's box office, meaning whatever profit the film makes in itself must be paid to Mr Brando and an equal financial equivalent must also be paid to Mr Brando.

No images, stills, video, audio or likeness of Mr Brando may be used in the production or marketing of 'Mind Terrorists' and any mention of his name in conjunction with the film, in print or video, is defamatory and will result in a fine of 12 million dollars, to be paid by the producers of said film.

Mr Brando reserves full intellectual copyright over the screenplay, film, and merchandising of 'Mind Terrorists' and any use of such in private or public is prohibited.

The producers of 'Mind Terrorists were apparently reeling last night over this "oversight" and were "reviewing various legal avenues" in regards to the contract. Unfortunately, the Brando contract states that:

Any attempt to review legal avenues relating to 'Mind Terrorists' is a dereliction of the contract of Mr Brando and will be punished by immediate criminal proceedings.

The producers have since committed suicide.

Hello and Welcome

This a blog devoted to news and information regarding the upcoming WB/Paramount/TV3 production 'Mind Terrorists'. The film is currently in development and is tentatively scheduled for release in July 2014. With an estimated budget of 734 million dollars, it is considered to be the most expensive film ever envisaged. The lead role of Jefferson Franklin, M.D. has been linked to a number of high-profile actors including Sean Penn, Marlon Brando, Pauly Shore and Haley Joel Osment. It was revealed in March 2007 that Gore Vidal had auditioned for the role of Drakul Sinistere, the chief antagonist. Heath Ledger had recorded extensive narration for the project prior to his untimely involvement in A Knight's Tale. Meryl Streep auditioned for the role of Eleanor Franklin in 2003 but a series of underwhelming blowjobs led to the part been given to Paris Hilton.